| II.5.069 |
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In early January Bluemud returned to Granite Gorge for three days. What he found there
depressed him intensely: the winter was matching his worst expectations and he left as
soon as he could. Soon after his return to the Capital, Vera visited him on a matter of
importance. 'Have you spoken to Elizabeth?' 'About what?' 'My husband tells me that Dean Wilson spoke to you both at Christmas.' 'That's right but I haven't spoken to Elizabeth about it. I trust her. She's quite capable of looking after herself. She's no fool.' 'You see, Eldridge,' said Vera awkwardly, 'I have only just found out about it. Jack doesn't feel he can speak to Angel about such matters. He and Angel have not been close for some time.' 'Why are you telling me all this?' 'Jack wants me to go to Shining River and speak to Angel. I thought we could go together, you and I, and speak to them.' 'You want me to take your husband's place, Vera?' 'It is difficult to explain,' said Vera unhappily. 'Angel will probably not listen to me but, if Elizabeth is there... Elizabeth seems such a steady, sensible girl.' 'I still don't see why your husband can't come.' Vera looked at Bluemud pathetically. Her looked appeared to say, do this for me and I will do anything you wish. She said, 'When Jack spoke to me he thought you might be... sympathetic.' 'Oh, alright,' said Bluemud. As they flew down together across the icy land Bluemud felt angry with himself. Here he had been coveting this woman as his mistress and now she was using him as a surrogate for her husband, a man for whom he had very little sympathy. 'We must go and see the Tutor first,' said Vera. 'Do you think that's wise?' 'It is only polite. We must let him know we are doing our duty by our children.' They parked at the University and walked together through the woodland towards the Rev. Williams house. Despite the fact that everywhere else was suffering through the most severe winter in fifty years the afternoon was mild and spring like. The Rev. Williams received the pair most cordially. He was gratified, overwhelmed. 'Naturally the Dean informed me that he had spoken to Secretary Passareil and Mr. Bluemud and I, of course, would have done so had the Dean not found the opportunity first. The best thing would be to stay here and have some refreshment while I call the dormitory and summon the girls here.' 'Oh, no,' began Bluemud, 'I... ' 'A good idea. We should be delighted, Reverend Williams,' said Vera. 'It's too much trouble,' said Bluemud angrily. 'Oh, it's no trouble, Mr. Bluemud,' said Helga enthusiastically. 'We are always delighted to entertain the parents of my husband's charges. They can't come often enough for us.' Bluemud fumed. A confidential chat would have been awkward enough. Now what was Elizabeth going to think? How on earth had he got himself into this mess? Elizabeth and Angel arrived separately and met outside the house. They were cold and distant with each other having had very little contact in the past two weeks. 'There they are!' beamed the Rev. Williams. 'Angel! Elizabeth! We've some people here to see you.' Elizabeth was plainly shocked to see her father and the color drained from her face. 'Your parents have come on an important matter which concerns you both. Their presence demonstrates, however unpleasant that which must be said, that they care truly for your welfare. But you and they needn't worry. Now we're all here together I can take the onus from their shoulders. That, after all, is my job.' The Rev. Williams smiled brightly and launched into a long diatribe concerning all sorts of evils that young girls should avoid. Bluemud squirmed. He could not look Elizabeth in the eye. He could feel her righteous indignation boring into him. How could he have subjected her to this? An interminable ninety minutes passed before the parents and their children left together. Angel was furious. As they walked back towards the campus she was shouting at her mother and her words drifted back to Bluemud and Elizabeth walking an hundred yards behind, not speaking. 'How could you do this to me, mother? I won't be paraded for anybody's sake! I'm not a fool. I'm not a child. I know what's going on.' But Vera, her duty done, walked with her head held high and Angel's words did not appear to affect her. The more Bluemud walked through the campus and saw the pervasive presence of the Army - there were boisterous, insolent cliques of officers everywhere - the guiltier he felt. Of course he should have spoken to Elizabeth, he saw that now. Elizabeth was perfectly trustworthy but she was, well, sexually naive. This was hardly the right time for her to be thinking about finding a husband, despite what he had said before. Close by the parking lot Elizabeth said, 'I feel the same as Angel. You had no business to come like this. Especially to the Pastor's house.' Then, as usual in conflicts with this daughter whom he loved more than life itself, Bluemud struck back saying harshly, 'I've been to Granite Gorge. The weather's awful. They're getting very hungry.' Elizabeth looked even more upset. 'Do you think I should go back?' 'No!' he snapped. 'You've done enough to raise suspicion already. You stay here.' On the return journey Vera sobbed intermittently and they exchanged few words but, to Bluemud's surprise she insisted upon coming to his apartment. There she sat on his couch while he mixed her a drink then she sipped it silently. When Bluemud took her hand she did not resist. Vera had always been like this but now Bluemud felt he could not tolerate her placid attitude. 'It was your idea, Vera. You wanted to go there. You wanted to come here. You wanted me to speak to your daughter whom I hardly know from Adam then when we get there you drag us off to a sanctimonious parson who delivers a lecture calculated to send any intelligent young girl straight into the bed of the first young man she meets.' 'You don't think she would?' Vera was aghast. 'Why not? What does it matter anyway? There are worse things in life.' Vera began to sob again. 'I must explain. Try to understand my point of view, Eldridge. Jack loves his daughter far more than he loves me. When Angel was a little girl he was absolutely devoted to her. With me, it's the other way around. I love Jack more. But, as Jack grew older he rose higher in the Government and he saw... things, you know... you saw them too... didn't you?' Bluemud stared at Vera, not responding. 'Do you know what I mean, Eldridge?' 'Yes.' '...things he would have to do. Bad things, he said. Evil but necessary. The War was coming on. Jack felt responsible. He saw no escape and he could not bear Angel to be... I don't know.' 'Contaminated is the word you're looking for Vera.' She nodded. 'Angel was about eight then. He put a gulf between them. He saw her as little as possible after that. Now I think Angel hates her father.' 'And what am I supposed to do about that?' 'I just thought you could help.' 'I could have done more if you would have let me.' 'Yes, perhaps.' 'Do you know what I wanted, Vera? I wanted you to be my mistress.' 'Then I will,' she said. Though Bluemud had his mistress that evening she was not the pleasure he had anticipated and it was the only time. |
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